I hope you’re all doing well, following your dreams, and of course watching a lot of TV! I’m trying my best to keep up with the array of high quality television options even though the past year has been the most stressful time in my life. I’ve been working on putting the pieces together for this ‘ultimate goal of mine’ to pursue television! I don’t know how it all will pan out in the end, but I’m motivated and excited to be so passionate about something and to be given the opportunity to go after it! Currently, I’m stressed, nervous, and debating on just hiding under my blankets forever. But I’m also super PUMPED!
I’ll save all of the TV talk for my other posts, because I want to be candid here. This blog has been such a perfect outlet for me to express myself. I hope that I am positively inspiring you all to dream big and take pride in the things that you love. Write about your favorite musicians, shows and films, show off your photography, express your wanderlust, talk about your feelings…
And on that note, here’s a life update:
The thing about being 100% focused on an academic or career goal is that life/reality kind of becomes warped. I call it the “tunnel-vision effect” (is that a real thing?), because for the past 3 years, going to grad school has been my ultimate goal with this past year being a force to be reckoned with! I couldn’t imagine anything else that could make me happier. I just knew for sure that I had fallen in love with television and that I found myself lighting up or glowing when given the opportunity to talk about this thing that I love so much.
But what happens when in the midst of following one path something (or someone) else starts to catch your eye? Yeah, that’s where I am right now. I, by all means, am not an expert on life or happiness, but I do know for a fact that life is unpredictable and the things that make you happy and that give you joy should be acknowledged and taken seriously!
A really good friend of mine has begun to mean a lot more to me than I anticipated. This person, whose smile, whose positive attitude, whose kindness, whose inclusiveness and acceptance, and whose drive and passion towards their own goals has floored me! I’m in awe when I am around him. Out of nowhere, here you are in my life and I have to go so far away for my dreams. My dear friend has become a spark who definitely brightens my day. And yeah, it sucks because I don’t think it would be fair to actually do something about it. Even though I want to. All in all – I’m a mess right now!
Basically, I’m experiencing something that’s such a surprise that I can barely put into words. With life and all of the things uncertain about it, I’m grateful that I’m getting the chance to finally feel something other than finding validation in school or work. I don’t know what will happen to this spark, but I’m glad that it’s here at least for now. This specific feeling is new to me, so I’m trying to work my way through it. It’s terrifying, but also kind of great.
P.S. On another note, I’m still working on my Mad Men post, but as you all can imagine – I’ve been a bit distracted. 🙂
‘Til next time!